A fun Valentine gift for the girl of my dreams

Mission Accomplished

Best performance of the Comedy of Errors yet.

 I'm tired and have an early morning so I'm cutting straight to the point.

Anytime I got scared, I was in my head going through a checklist of things I should do before I step on stage: warm-up this or that, check this, make sure to say this that way or that. Whenever, I started running in the wheel like a hamster, I would remind myself of my last post. And, it brought me back to the "now", "present", "moment".

what is improtant

So, Im in a bit of a bored state tonight. In Whitewater, Wisconsin, and understanding why people are always trying to run from the Midwest. Not to be mean, it's just what I've heard from the mouths of people who have lived here and Im kinda getting what they are saying.

So, I'm bored...in a week of being on tour I'm over drinking, board gaming, video gaming, movies, feeling a bit of a disconnect with the "girlfriend"(part of being an actor), don't really want to talking to anyone, don't feel like networking, don't feel like shooting the breeze.

Moreover, the things I want to do are self destructive i.e. fight, fuck, eat till Im sick, you get the idea. Judge tenderly.

So, Im sitting here and thinking well what the hell is really important...you know a bit of a Hamlet moment.

Okay, lets see. "I want to have sex...can't because of a promise...what to fight....can't because I'll get arrested, hurt, and who know maybe the guy I pick a fight with turns out to be someone really cool and then I'll feel horrible on top of it all."  Then it comes to me like a warm summer breeze. If I was in a play I could....I could... be anything and do anything ...yeah like in Comedy of Errors...yeah now that's fun...climbing in and hiding in a chest of drawers...spinning around on stage with Bjorn" Then it comes to me-"...shit if I like it so much then why am I scared shitless when I act sometimes. More so, why in the hell would I rush anything I do or say onstage.... ever.

Breakthrough.

(Talking to myself)," Shit that's what they mean when people say I can be or do anything onstage." No duh you the reader are thinking but, "man to say and believe it is one thing...but to live that onstage unabashed, to really let yourself get lost....wow that's intense."

Can I be real withyouall the readers. Us actors, until we hit a certain level, are f@8cking broke, our lovers and family are far away, always dealing with unemployment. The list goes on. So then, why on earth would I ever...EVER not be as fully express onstage, and take as much time as I want or need and just reveal in it.

 Here is what I mean. In rehearsal if you're acting across from another person and you feel the impulse to kiss. Well, shit you better. And make it the best kiss ever. Or say, you're in the middle of running a scene and all of a sudden you want to scream and throw yourself on the floor... you better do it. If your bored in the scene and don't buy it, say it and don't be.

In performance, if you're talking to the audience then, damn it, do it as naked as possible, I mean stop acting and dare to really talk to someone. When performing in anything the goal is to get lost. Lose yourself in the moment, you own it for that fucking brief moment in time. Don't be scared, if you believe it, love it, and get lost in it, we will think you're a god for it.

CAUSE THAT IS IT. THAT ALL YOU GET... EVER. IT'S THE ONLY TIME YOU LIFE LETS YOU GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING.!!!!!!!!!

NEXT ...PERFORMANCE IT'S ON.

dance party before show of Julius Caesar

Enjoy